I have so much to write about. After Thanksgiving I won't be wearing the headscarf. I realized that I'm just as much nervous to go to school with my hair out as I was to wear the headscarf to school. Silly, but true. I feel like I'm going to get more comments and even concerns. But, I am happy to be taking it off. I keep thinking about planning all the outfits I'm going to wear (they're probably aren't going to be that different) & how I'm going to wear my hair. I can't tell if I'm more excited to be able to wear whatever I want or to have my hair out. At the same time though modest fashion does suit me in some ways. I love it stylistically, and it's definitely something I'm going to take with em. And the comfort and mystery of a headscarf is not something I will forget. Mystery. It was fun to be mysterious. Even though, I do think modesty is an attitude/life choice rather than just an outfit. Modesty is so much more than clothing. How you dress is an extension of you, but it is not everything. At the end of the day clothing is just a piece of fabric and what really matters is your character and your hearts modesty.
I haven't been wearing my headscarf on the weekends for the past two weeks and I went on a walk around Philly without it today. It's not me. I feel me without it. When I see Muslim women without my headscarf, I still think I have it on and I wonder if they'll say Salam, but then I remember I'm not wearing it. Can't wait to not wear it. Probably after Thanksgiving.
I have started to notice that I don't want my neighbors to see my headscarf. Now, that I have a bit more free time and a little less stress, I think I should engross myself into my capstone.
I don't wear the headscarf in different styles like I thought I would. I wear it in the most generic egg head way. I don't have a lot of different scarves or maybe I do. But, I don't know, it is a lot of effort to try different styles in the morning. Which, is the same reason of why I would wear my hair in a bun so much.
I don't want to wear the headscarf, but modest fashion/man repelling fashion is definitely something I'm going to be taking with me. I like it and God wants his followers to be modest, so it's something I am thinking about.
I talked to my capstone mentor yesterday, and I'm really glad I did. I think she is the perfect mentor for my capstone. I want to create a fashion for women by women. It will be about dressing for yourself. I don't want to exclude men, but at the same time I do... Whoops. Would I throw a fit women were excluded? I don't want to reject the feminine boy. I don't want to forget the gender neutral person. I want to show all types of fashion, but also have a spiritual side to it.
Asking people questions like:
Do your beliefs affect how you dress?
Have you ever had a style epiphany?
A spiritual epiphany?
I'm inspired by websites like The Man Repeller & Style Like U. Websites that are all inclusive and promote dressing for yourself.
I want to create something that shows how people dress to make themselves happy. Can you dress for someone else and still be happy?
Eventually it would be cool if it could turn into a small magazine.